30 Days of Truth - Day 28

What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

I remember the day I found out that I was pregnant. Oh my word what a period of mixed emotions that was. Unplanned but not unwelcome news at the time. Pretty momentous all the same.

As the pregnancy progressed and my body changed it was kind of a wondrous thing to feel a little one moving around inside. To see her on the screen at the ultrasound scans. Perfect little fingers and toes, and such a funny little nose. Tiniest hands making the smallest of waves.

To lose Charlotte so late on in the pregnancy was very hard. It tore me apart to the point where I thought I might never recover. Grief feels so unbearable at the time doesn't it? You think it will never ease but time does it's work in this respect as in so many others.

And now in retrospect although I do still feel some of that sadness at times, I also feel deeply grateful to have experienced that wonder at all.


  1. Oh Jos, my heart broke when I read this post.
    Love, love, love and a zillion hugs.xoxo

  2. Oh sweetie, I am so sorry. Charlotte is such a lovely name. I'm grateful too...for the parts you got to hold, and mourn with you the parts lost.

    Love you Citrus.

  3. Hi Jos
    Eeek wrote a long comment,then lost it. Popped in to wish you and yours a very Merry Xmas and happy healthy 2011 (hope not tooo cold for you!). Lotsa hugs
    Joss xx
    Read your days of truth and they gave me a lump/lumps in my throat!

  4. i read this earlier. i can feel your tenderness jos. i know what you mean about knowing the experiencing. there is child i too will not know in this time and place. and another who i love with all my might and all my heart.

    charlotte is a beautiful name, just right.

    with love