The black dog

When people talk about depression they aren't all talking about depression. Some are talking about the blues which is something entirely different. I don't talk about my depression much. In fact for years I didn't even know how to label what ailed me.

About 2 years ago I went to the docs and talked about what was going on in my head. I'm glad I did even though I was really scared. The meds don't make it all better but they do help. The thing is that when I start to deteriorate mental health wise I don't always realise until I am really quite unwell. It's hard to ask for help. I don't know why it's so hard ... it just is.

I know it's stupid to wish things away. It's what children do isn't it? I do wish though. I wish my mind was in better shape.