Houston we have a problem

I am sure it is apparent from the last few posts that I have a problem. It would be so tempting to tell you that I am in recovery but the truth is that my recovery journey of late has involved mostly prolonged "detours". These leave me feeling confused, depleted and cast out from the person I aspire to be. So I am going to take an extended blogging break to take some time out in order to get straight again. xx Jos


  1. - or you could use us to get you through.

    To be the person you aspire to be. I wonder on this gently, Jos, because I see it in myself. I wonder if we concentrate so on endings, desiring the finished product, and should instead be ok with the journey there. Oh, easy enough for me to write it but to live it is different, I know. Just wanted you to know that we are all imperfect by a long stretch, and all continually in that process aspiring to be that better person.

    much love
    wishing you much strength


  2. Erin is a wise woman Jos, listen to her. I think you are pretty terrific, but I know what counts is how you feel about you. I am here for you. write me, email me, keep in touch. I care about you. xoxo

  3. Do whatever it is you have to do to regain your equilibrium and get back on your recovery road, Jos. We'll all be here pulling for you when you get back. I'll be praying for you and sending you healing thoughts. Love & Blessings!

    "If instead of a gem, or even a flower, we should cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart of a friend, that would be giving as the angels give." ~George MacDonald

  4. jos, i hope you don't mind my being direct.

    you are too hard on yourself. i keep looking for reasons why but they are too deep for me to understand.

    however, i know a good person when i meet one. i am rarely wrong. and dammit dammit dammit, will you please forgive yourself? please jos?

    you know very well i have had my challenges and there is someone i held and to my amazement still hold love for who views me as a horrible mistake and selfish and dysfunctional. it hurts, i know you know that, but jos, i can't let that define me, because really, that is not who i am.

    i want to forgive her & myself and mostly be thankful. i want this for you too.

    i am serious!

    your friend kj

  5. Hang in there Jos, it does get easier.

    Whatever the bent is, the landing can be soft or a hell ride. Whichever way it is for you Jos, be kind to yourself.

    It took me a long time to love myself under any circumstance, but tell yourself you love yourself. Keep doing it, softly, or which ever way feels best.

    This is true Jos, you are the love you give.

    Love and kindness


  6. Good luck... we'll be here when you return.

  7. Jos! you can't leave me!!
    of course you gotta do what you gotta do.
    The blogging for me turned into something that gives me enormous support, but when it doesn't feel like that anymore, you probably need a break. First my blogging was only to share, to express. In the beginning (as keeper) i didn't even know about a blogging community. I was just giving to myself. When that's gone for you too.
    okay then you may go.
    but i'll stay, i promise i will leave you a note here once and a while.