30 Days of Truth: Day 2

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.

Just as exercise one was easy peasy so today's is trickier. This learning to be gentler with oneself and becoming more self accepting is a difficult art to master.

Conversely after yesterdays exploration one thing I am learning to love about myself is that I am able to confront uncomfortable truths in a way I would never have thought possible even a couple of years ago. Not only to confront them but to work towards overcoming / improving / accepting them as well. I can see that some courage is involved in this process.

By learning to open my heart more freely I am increasingly becoming more self accepting. It is a slow process but one where I am able to see progress even so. I have had to be willing to explore my flaws and get used to the fact that whilst I might aspire to perfection I am never actually going to be perfect this side of eternity ... and possibly not even then!

There is something in the rigidity of my thinking that makes me incredibly resistant to this truth. It is one of those things I am having to force myself to accept, and learn to love myself regardless of these imperfections as I see them. I accept these things on a rational level, of course I do ... but emotionally accepting them is a different matter entirely. It grates.

I suppose I love the fact that at least I keep on trying. I am not passively waiting to be rescued but am paddling my own little boat through the choppy seas of life. Effort is never enough on it's own though ... something again I have had to learn to accept more fully. That along with having the humility to seek help with navigational skills. After all, it's pretty pointless paddling like crazy if we're just going around in circles.

Physically I love the fact that I look a lot like my mother. She looks good. She is a very direct and forthright person and it shows. She looks strict and stern because that is what runs through her core. She has had to be so strong in order to survive the knocks life has thrown her way. I admire that in her, even whilst wishing there was more softness in her character. I look at her and see myself years from now. In looks she has aged gracefully and I hope to emulate that.