A childhood friend

How wonderfully strange to be with you today
although thirty five years have passed us by
since we as two and three girls sat alongside
and walked any kind of sandy beach together
a lifetime by pretty much anyones' measure
and yet here you are, still looking as you do

Somehow familiar in that comfortable way
of children who've grown up through hard times
and so know the value of good times together
and that tears on arrival are a welcome home
I loved that you were moved by our meeting
and pretty much everything about today too

In particular when we wandered to be alone
shell hunting again after all these years
feeling the tug of memories long since lost
except so vivid still in your recollections
lovingly relayed with waving arms and words
ah now that is something I do remember

How you continually express what goes on inside
drawing pictures in my mind with your words
you still do that, I'm amazed we sill connect
it seems you are so, so very smart these days
using words I have only the vaguest notion of
and yet ... well there it is, you are still you

This incredible woman, yet with a clear sense
that somehow you are not nearly enough
that you must even now still measure up
to some ideal, some meaningless standard
I wish I knew you more fully in this time
translating my past admiration to the present

What can I tell you that you don't already know
we were children the last time we sat together
on the kerb kicking against things not wanted
even then I remember the way you looked to the sky
the way you drew vivid pictures with your words
and now you do the same thing with your pen

I wish,
god how I wish,
that I could express
this better
you
you mean something to me
I remember
you
I try not to remember
so many things

but

that does not include you.

4 comments:

  1. jos. this is beautiful. your friend will be so touched to read this. some bonds are strong enough. isn't that so great to know? i think the shared experience of childhoodsomehow allows friends and family then to be themselves now.

    i read this, jos, and i felt happy for you.

    this is my favorite line:

    'even then I remember the way you looked to the sky'


    love
    kj

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  2. Jos, This is so wonderful, it made me cry. In a good way. Your words always have the power to move me deeply. You are an amazing writer. Never doubt that. xoxo

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  3. Friends
    current ones, new ones,
    to reconnect with old ones
    nothing beats that

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